Thursday, May 24, 2012

Thursday, Thursday--You Are Not My Friend, Thursday

I'm starting to not like Thursdays so much, what with this whole weigh in thing going on. It's not been my greatest week. I've been angry a lot and angry leads me to binge. And I've been off my water. I just didn't feel like drinking eight or more glasses every day so I didn't. I did work out. Okay, I love my workouts--my saving grace, I suppose. I love to run and I love to strength train--especially since my surgery this year when I was so limited afterward in what I was capable of doing and now there aren't any limits other than what I impose on myself. So I push those limits as much as I can because it feels so good after, and it really helps with the anger and stress when you have all those endorphins running round your brain. And I ran four and a half miles yesterday, something I hadn't done in over a year. I could've cried I was so happy! Breathing down the back of five...yeah, that feels really good....All these friends are training for and running half-marathons and I'm so jealous!! And also so very happy and proud of them--Katie and Amy and Jerry, you guys rock!!

But the darn rotten scale didn't budge a bit, still holding steady at 169. Ugh. No new rewards and I'm really falling behind on my weight loss schedule! I should've been reaching my goal in another three weeks and I'm eight pounds behind...That's hard to accept. But, I'm the one who binged. I'm the one who didn't drink the water. I've got no one and nothing else to blame but myself and my choices. Bitter pills....bitter pills...

So, anyway...I'm off to the hospital this afternoon for the pulmonary function test, see if I've begun to develop COPD after twenty-three years of smoking. I ran four and a half miles yesterday--COPD my patootie!! This girl's not going down without a fight!! And I'm ready to make much better choices this week--or in the very least, shoot the stupid scale!! Who's with me??

Must Love God

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