I try to think I’ve gotten good at adapting to change these past eleven years I’ve been married. My husband is not one to sit still. I swear he has gypsy blood running through his mostly Italian veins. We’ve moved from job to job, state to state. Our first move to Ohio, I was a brand new mom with a colicky baby left alone in a land of total strangers and a husband who was gone traveling at least four days out of every seven day week. The next move we struggled under the strain of two mortgages for over a year, and then fought to find our way out of the credit card debt we accrued trying to keep food on the table that year. We spent almost six months apart on our last move so we wouldn’t end up in the same financial mess again.
Those experiences were hard. But definitely one thing has grown out of them: my faith and trust in God. That first move to Ohio-our realtor’s wife had organized a moms’ group that quickly became my family and my sanity for the two and a half years we were there. Clearly God knew I’d need a solid group of friends; He already had them ready and waiting for me.
Much harder was the year of two mortgages. I cried and prayed as I waited for God to come through for us, for news that we finally had a buyer, that light at the end of a very long, stressful tunnel of a year. I wondered what lesson I was supposed to be learning, but now I know it was to be patient and trust. That year was the most faith growing I’ve seen. We had found a wonderful church with a weekly family Bible study group. I completely delved into growing my relationship with God. Then finally, when I thought we’d just absolutely break under the financial pressure, we got news of a buyer. We still had quite a mess left on our plates even after that house sold, but one thing that came shining out of that darkness was faith. I learned God’s timing is certainly not our timing, but I also learned He’s always got our back. Had our house sold in a month or two, would I have grown the faith I now have?
When the next move rolled around and Bill headed home to Pennsylvania while Michael and I stayed behind to sell our house in Tennessee, I was much better prepared. I put every ounce of my trust in God that He would see us through, no matter how long we would have to wait. It wasn’t easy being separated for so long and certainly there were some issues that came up during the sale that would’ve gone much smoother had Bill been there with us. But, the timing couldn’t have worked out more perfect. Michael finished that year of school right before we closed. We met the five years requirement almost to the day to receive the seller’s tax abatement, which was a nice little reimbursement. And we moved home the same weekend Ashlee would be in town for her girlfriend’s wedding! God’s timing is always perfect.
So, here I sit. I find myself blessed with another wonderful group of friends. Close to family, which we hadn’t had at all for the past eight years. And I know change is gonna come. It always does. When is no longer an issue. It’s how will I respond? I wrote the other day God doesn’t want us to be stagnant.
Grain has to be ground to become bread.
If we are the seeds planted for the harvest, the grain to become bread, grain must be ground up before it can become bread. We struggle and strain as God shapes and grows us-the grinding of the grain, the becoming of the bread.
In repentance and rest is your salvation,
In quietness and trust is your strength.
So I trust. I know no matter what may come, God has me covered. He provides everything we need, exactly when we need it. I trust in Him to grow me, that I may become bread.
Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
Do not put out the Spirit’s fire; do not treat prophecies with contempt. Test everything. Hold on to the good.