Wednesday, February 15, 2012

What I Miss Most

Freedom and privacy. You don't realize how much you take simple freedoms for granted until you no longer have the ability to go and do whatever you want, whenever you want. I'm not allowed to drive for at least another week. I'm not allowed to clean my own house. Never in a million years would I have thought that would bother me, but it is driving me insane this week! Watching dog hair and water spots accumulate and I can't do anything about it...I have surrendered my laundry to another woman who doesn't fold the way I do and she keeps putting my pants in the dryer even after I told her not to. I can't just pop in my car and zip over to Walmart or run to the mall, swing by Sheetz for a quick cup of coffee...I want my house and my life back.

And all of my life is under her scrutiny. Everything I eat. Everything I watch on TV. Every piece of clothes I wear. Every text I get. Everything I do wrong with Michael. And I have to hear about it. Or I hear her telling others about it on the phone when her friends from Florida call, or my uncle who she talks to daily. As if my life is her business to share. It's pushing me to the very edge.

Tucker wanted to wake everyone up at five-thirty this morning, growling victorious at the baby gate with chewies crammed in his mouth. I whisked him outside with Ruby and sent the people back to bed. This is my time--my peace. I can't run away but I'm trying not to scream. I'm praying for patience to make it through another week...

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