Monday, September 10, 2012

A Little Melancholy Monday

My mom stopped by yesterday. It was a nice surprise. She usually doesn't like to drive this far but she'd brought me some nice big, sturdy boxes for moving. We had a good visit and I was even a little teary after she'd left again. After all, we'd come home to be closer to her and we've hardly seen her at all these past two and a half years. And tomorrow she's swinging by the cemetery for my brother's birthday. That was one thing I wanted to do before we left-I wanted to stop by my father's grave one last time. But I won't make it tomorrow and I most likely won't get down to Pittsburgh before we leave. But I tell myself, he's not really there anyway...I'd just be saying good-bye to a stone marking where his body was laid four years ago. He, himself, is not there.

I miss my dad. I've been doing all this drawing and tangling lately and I know he'd love it. That was the gift we shared, our art. I'd love to show him Zentangle and watch him give it a try--I think he'd be really great at it. He always drew so clean and precise-he would master Zentangle in a flash. Mom also gave me Dad's oil paint set. I'm sure the paints are way past being any good, but just to have that case and his brushes, that piece of him...is pure treasure. Who knows, maybe I'll take some oil painting classes after we get settled and channel Dad's spirit, sitting on the beach watching the waves roll in with sea gulls chasing overhead, grains of sand blowing into the paint and adding a little extra texture...

I wonder what he would think about us moving to New England. If he were still alive, surely he'd be excited to have an excuse to come up and visit, go fishing in the bay or take a boat out on the ocean and drop a line or two there. Maybe find a golf course and play a couple rounds with Bill.

I worry about leaving Mom again. But, she's fine. So independent, like her mother was after my grandfather had died. Couldn't keep that woman down and Mom's the same way. She's already planning her Florida trip, most likely counting the days--she's so much happier there. I don't know why she doesn't just stay. Sell her house here and stay where she's happy. Maybe some day. That has to be her decision--no one could ever tell her what she ought to do...but maybe some day...

Now I'm looking forward to spending time with Bill's family. I can't even remember the last time I was up there! He's gone a handful of times without Michael and me the past few years. Couldn't always afford both the airfare and boarding the dogs, so he'd go and visit himself. Michael barely knows his cousins there, like he hardly knew his cousins here. Too many years living too far away. And now that Sissie is there as well, he'll really be happy--finally all of us together again as we should've been all along. It's gonna be so good!

So, continuing counting to 1000 gifts this morning:

583. Finding 'lost treasure' (more watercolor pencils and Gelly Roll pens!) in my old stash of art goodies
584. Corn and Hot Dog Roast at church (need I mention all the yummy desserts??!! Aaahhh!)
585. Our pastor playing Gaga Ball with the kids

586. Garden fresh tomato sammies--the very best of summer!
587. The new house passed inspection with flying colors!
588. Morning running again---aaahhh!
589. Coffee time with the girls
590. Another big bucket of tomatoes (Missy loves me!)
591. Playing with new watercolors and colored pencils
592. Coffee in the angel mug my dad gave me a long, long time ago-now he's my angel


593. Received my first ATC from our Zia group swap! (Realizing there really should be a picture here, it's beautiful!)
594. Rain, rain, rain...I'm so feeling the rain this week.
595. Beautiful cool fall temps at last
596. Leaves just beginning to sneak some color
597. Nice visit with Mom
598. My first Dangle is done! I like it! (Dangles are a little spin off of sorts of Zentangle, created by artist Joanne Fink)
This week's Idea Journal page, thought I'd try a Dangle...I could've probably added more, but then I wouldn't have anywhere to write my plans for the week!
Care to count with us?

1 comment:

  1. thanks for sharing a glimpse of your life ~

    and such beautiful thoughts about your dad! and mom!

    blessings!

    ReplyDelete

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